ONE HUNDRED FROGS LATER...

We've all been there. Stuck in on a Saturday night, eating Kettle Chips in front of Casualty and bemoaning the lack of decent single men (or women) out there.

Hell, some of us are still there and we're married, but that's for another day...

The fact is, there are hundreds of eligible men and women out there, who've eagerly typed their details into various websites and searched for their ideal partner online. Cherry-picking a boyfriend - I wish it had been an option when I was sixteen, I was always rubbish at talking to boys but I was a demon with the written word!

Onehundredfrogs is a fabulously funny blog dedicated to one brave woman's mission to find Prince Charming among the various amphibians that lurk in the slimy pond of the internet. Working on the principle that by sheer probability alone, if she dates 100 men, one of them at least has got to be worth the effort, she's documenting her search for Mr Right-about-now online for all of us curious people to nose at.

If I were single, I'd offer to help her out....

Scroll down for an exclusive excerpt...

"I've had trouble finding Man number 7. I did attempt to make a date with someone from my regular dating site and we spoke on the phone and he seemed nice. But then he told me that he hates dogs. Now, I'm very suspicious of people who don't like animals - and I should have certainly added this to my list of essential qualities, but I forgot. EVERY single person I've ever met who doesn't like animals, even a person I was friends with for 12 years, has turned out to be fundamentally cold and selfish - with a secret internal hatred of people as well (after all, what are we but animals?) So, in a potential partner, a hatred of of animals - even if it's just one species, is out of the question for me.

Besides, I have a dog.

And there is a picture of my dog on my profile - so why a dog hater would contact me in the first place is beyond me.

Just to add a little evidence to what I've already built up in my head about animal-haters, this potential Man number 7 reacted very strangely to me telling him I couldn't go out with him. Here are our last two messages to each other. Remember that I've never met this man and I spoke to him on the phone only twice (the second time we spoke he rang me when I was with my dad and I couldn't talk).

I said to him:

"I should tell you now that I really did enjoy talking to you last week but can't even contemplate being with someone who doesn't like dogs or who is afraid of dogs. My dog is a huge part of my life. I've been out with someone before who didn't like my dog and it just didn't work out well at all! She lives in the house, sleeps in the bedroom and gets on the furniture and is... well... more entitled to be in the room than a visitor! My ex wanted me to lock her outside. Of course, it ended up with him being locked outside :-)

I'm really sorry. I was a bit nervous of saying this as I don't like to behave in a way that could make you feel rejected (even though it's not much of a rejection because we've never met!).

Anyway - I'll leave it now. Sorry. Take care of yourself and I hope you find someone."

His reply was titled:

Fine, but why make up the dog story?

"Me thinks the woman does protest too much. What does irk is the obvious lie about the dog. I thought that I would like to meet you. Then last Saturday's phone call made me realise that you had lost interest. To use the dog as an excuse now is unnecessary and rather pathetic. I would just be honest next time.

Your exscuse clearly was a gross exaggeration. Of course you may well have met someone else. Fine, but just say so.

I have seen how shallow you can be and I have no hestitation in saying that I have leaned far more about you than you have about me."

Weird attack for no reason! I was being completely honest and I thought he was nice other than the dog thing. I'm glad I didn't go out with him - so defensive. Why would he presume it was a lie - especially when there's a pic of my dog on my profile!

Just goes to show. Avoid animal haters at all costs.